2023-12-12
Heya! So... It's been a while. 
So! A general collection of what's been going on for the past month since my last blog post.
My hand has recovered! I now have a gnarly scar from my battle with the blender blade. No, seriously, it looks dope as hell. I won't make you look at it, though.
A fanfiction I wrote for a fandom under a different pseudonym started a whole debacle on Twitter that I didn't notice because I wasn't on Twitter. I found out about it through a series of weird-ass coincidences. Anyways, I've always been nervous about sharing my writing with the world, and that's made it 10 times worse because a fic I wrote for personal catharsis ended up becoming the butt of many, many jokes in the fandom that really only stopped when I disclosed I had trauma. Anyways, this whole shitshow lead to a bunch of fanfic authors within the fandom feeling super uncomfortable sharing their own work because everyone was clowning on a serious work I wrote for having appropriately tagged subject matter, so uh... my fic ended up causing a bunch of people to leave the fandom, at least temporarily, because fucking Twitter users don't know how to not click on things they don't like. (BTW I still haven't gotten an apology from the main person involved. LOL. LMAO. I did get apologies from some of the other people involved, at least.) But this leads into my next topic!
I had a mental breakdown. Well, multiple. Multiple mental breakdowns. And I don't really feel like sharing my writing anymore. I'm trying to get over it, but... I hate to say this, because it's stupidly miniscule in the grand scheme of things, but I think I legit have trauma from that.
It sucks, to show my soul, lay it bare and offer it to the world, and end up being laughed at because people are so irony-poisoned they think anything that talks about uncomfortable subject matter is a giant joke. I shouldn't have had to disclose that I have trauma related to something to be shown an amount of decency. No one should have to disclose their trauma in order to be able to write something without harassment, and I think a lot of the mindsets that lead to this only serve to further isolate people who've experienced trauma. I get people don't give a shit about people with trauma unless they can serve to further their own agendas and narratives, but it's depresssing to see it in action.
Aside from that, I haven't been doing a while lot. I finished Yakuza 3 and started 4. I finished replaying Divi-Dead. A game I like updated and removed a thing I like, so I've been learning Sugarcube to add it back in as a mod. That's about it, really.